News|Stories|Photos|Videos

[Possum]

Be sure to read all the way.

At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, AAFS President Dr Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death....

Here is the story -

On March 23, 1994 the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. Mr Opus had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to the effect indicating his despondency... As he fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window, which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the deceased was aware that a safety net had been installed just below the eighth floor level, to protect some building workers and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned.

"Ordinarily," Dr Mills continued, "A person who sets out to commit suicide and ultimately succeeds, even though the mechanism might not be what he intended, is still defined as committing suicide...." That Mr Opus was shot on the way to certain death, but probably would not have been successful, because of the safety net caused the medical examiner to feel that he had a homicide on his hands.

In the room on the ninth floor, where the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously and he was threatening her with a shotgun. The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger he completely missed his wife and the pellets went through the window striking Mr Opus.

When one intends to kill subject "A" but kills subject "B" in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject "B ." When confronted with the murder charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant, and both said that they thought the shotgun was unloaded... The old man said it was a long-standing habit to threatenhis wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore, the killing of Mr Opus appeared to be an accident; that is, if the gun had been accidentally loaded.

The continuing investigation turned up a witness, who saw the old couple's son loading the shotgun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident... It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother. Since the loader of the gun was aware of this, he was guilty of the murder, even though he didn't actually pull the trigger... The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus... Now comes the exquisite twist.

Further investigation revealed that the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder.. This led him to jump off the ten story building on March 23rd, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. The son had actually murdered himself, so the medical examiner closed the case - as a suicide.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(A true story from - Associated Press, Reported by Kurt Westervelt)

[red's tundra]

That's one hellofa coinsidence!!

[jenningspaige]

That story was in the movie Magnolia.... interesting.

[OHARE]

If you like that story, try reading the Darwin Awards.

http://www.tiac.net/users/cri/darwin.html

[Wadingboy]

Possum, ROTFLMAO. I needed a good laugh tonite, thanks!

[Possum]

Hey it's a true story!

That is why it's not on the BS Thread in Texas!

Glad some of you enjoyed it.

Dan

[Possum]

Thought I would start a new topic on "Stories". This was sent to me by email. Enjoy!


TEDDY'S TEACHER

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of
school, she told the children a lie.

Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said she loved them all the same. But that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.

Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed
that he didn't play well with the other children, that his clothes
were messy and that he constantly needed a bath.

And Teddy could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to
review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last.

However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprize. Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners...he is a joy to be around."

His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student,
well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle.

His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death had been hard
on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much
interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't
taken."

His fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't
show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and
he sometimes sleeps in class."

By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and was ashamed of herself.

She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas
presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except
for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in heavy, brown
paper that he got from a grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains
to open it in the middle of the other presents.

Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one quarter full of perfume.

But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the
perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you
smelled just like my Mom used to."

After the children left she cried for at least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead she began to teach children.

Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she
encouraged him, the faster he responded.

By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same,Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was still the best teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further.

The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer-the
letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, M. D.

The story doesn't end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he, he'd met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit in the place at the wedding that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.

Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. And she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.

They hugged each other, and Dr Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ears, "Thank you Mrs.Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference.

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said."Teddy you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."

[glock911]

Thanks for the story Possum,nice way to end my day!.....

[Boone]

Although not a story, inspirational to me, and hopefully to you. Just like Possum's story.

Anything is Possible

by: unknown

If there was ever a time to dare, to make a difference, to embark on something worth doing, IT IS NOW.
Not for any grand cause, necessarily... but for something that tugs at your heart, something that's your inspiration, something that's your dream.

You owe it to yourself to make your days here count. HAVE FUN. DIG DEEP. STRETCH.

DREAM BIG.

Know, though, that things worth doing seldom come easy. There will be good days. And there will be bad days.
There will be times when you want to turn around, pack it up, and call it quits. Those times tell you that you are pushing yourself, that you are not afraid to learn by trying.

PERSIST.

Because with an idea, determination, and the right tools, you can do great things. Let your instincts, your intellect, and your heart, guide you.

TRUST.

Believe in the incredible power of the human mind. Of doing something that makes a difference. Of working hard. Of laughing and hoping. Of lasting friends. Of all the things that will cross your path this year.

The start of something new brings the hope of something great.

[Possum]

The "Stella" Awards

We live in a sad sad world . . .

Stella Liebeck is the 81 year old lady who spilled coffee on herself
and sued McDonald's. This case inspired an annual award - The
"Stella" Awards - for the most frivolous lawsuits in the U.S. The following are this year's candidates:

1. January 2000:
Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little brat was Ms. Robertson's son.

2. June 1998:
A 19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

3. October 1998:
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was unable to get the garage door to go up since the automatic garage door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't reenter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, so Mr. Dickson
found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food he found in the garage. He sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed and awarded him $500,000.

4. October 1999:
Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced-in yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

5. May 2001:
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
Lancaster, Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a wet floor and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson threw it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

6. December 1997:
Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak in through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

7. November 2001:
Mr. George Cates of Clifton, Colorado purchased a brand new motor home. On his first trip home, having merged onto I-70, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the Winnebago left the freeway, crashed and
overturned. Mr. Cates sued Winnebago for not advising him in the handbook that he couldn't actually do this. He was awarded $1,750,000 plus a new Winnie. Winnebago actually changed their operator manuals as a result of this court case, just in case there are any other complete morons buying their vehicles.

[ElDiabloJoe]

In his Salsa thread, located here:
http://www.tundrasolutions.com/forum...4064#post44064

of this great story!

About 5 years ago I was living with this other recently divorced Deputy Sheriff co-worker. His name is/was Steve.

Steve was a great guy, and an even better drinker. He was always doing something embarassing, and was never too modest to share it with me, or anyone else for that matter.

So Steve, one day, was drinking with his girlfriend in some bar in the Hollyweird area of Los Angeles. They were there to meet up with one of Steve's girlfriend's girlfriends, whom Steve hadn't met before. Ya know, kind of a ladies' version of show and tell that they seem to do with their boyfriends. Showing em off to their friends.

Anyhow, like many people get, when the girlfriend's girlfriend learned Steve was a cop, the conversation gets centered on him and his duties, toys, experiences, etc.

Somewhere along the lines of conversation, it comes out that Steve's girlfriend's girlfriend is having problems with a ex-boyfriend doing a lightweight stalking kinda thing on her. Both Steve and (oops, almost said her name) his girlfriend strongly encourage the girlfriend's girlfriend to get a can of pepper spray for her protection.

Steve starts extolling the virtues of oleoresin capsicum and its many uses. One of these many uses is pranks. Steve, like most Deputies, laugh hysterically whenever someone on the news claims they were damaged beyond all repair when the Po-Lice sprayed them with pepper spray. Steve and the rest of laugh because we use pepper spray like water pistols. We shoot each other, we lace each other's lunches, we spray it in the ducts of the police car's air conditioning on a hot day before your partners get in their car, etc. Yes, it's an irritant. Yes, it hurts. Yes, it's a helluva lot of fun!

Anyhow....One thing you learn about pepper spray, especially when you watch inmates do this, is do NOT try to rinse it off your face with water. It is not water soluble. Water just causes it to spread around. If you try to rinse your eyes, you've just spread the irritant to the skin around your nose, cheeks, mouth, throat, etc.

So digressing.....

Steve's girlfriend's girlfriend asks for a demonstration because she's skeptical (either of pepper spray's uses or Steve's claimed antics). So Steve pulls out a little cannister of pepper spray, and aims it at the floor between his feet (they're all sitting at the bar of this Hollywood drinking establishment). Funny thing is that Steve's been drinking for about 5 hours at this point, and ends up he's pointing it the wrong way. He squirts himself in the face, much to the merriment of everyone else around!

Steve, being a wee bit inebriated and therefore not thinking straight, goes to the bathroom to...guess.....wash off his face. This latest development sobers Steve right up and he realizes just what the heck he's doing and stops, but too late. The pepper spray has spread alll over his face and hands!!!

The irritant dissipates after about 10-15 minutes and Steve and his girlfriend end their afternoon of show and tell and head back home.

After they are home for several minutes, Steve tells me this whole story, which gets me and my then-girlfriend laughing uncontrollably. I threaten to tell the fellahs at work the next day.

Steve and his girlfriend then find their way to Steve's room for a nap (so they said).

About 5 minutes later, I hear Steve's girlfriend screaming! Then she flings open their bedroom door and runs buck-stark-bouncingly naked to the bathroom and then slams that door shut!

I check on Steve to find him shaking his head and smirking. Seems that after pepper spray dissipates, it still remains on the skin and can be transferred to someone else. Remember Steve's fingers and face? Seems he set his girlfriend's "sensitive" areas afire....internally!

Great Story!

PS--Everyone and everything turn out fine and no worse for wear. Now you too can laugh at the crybabies on the news when you realize "other" places where pepper spray has ended up and of course, they didn't suffer any permanent dammage or claim emotional distress or any of that other BS, LOL!

PSS--Remind me in a coupla weeks, I've got a coupla more good "Steve" stories, lOL!

EDJ

[DevinSixtySeven]

I could not stop laughing when I read that one !

Also, the black bears in Alaska, the ones who are used to eating garbage, eventually enjoy the taste of pepper spray, and will actually open their mouths if you squirt them at close range, say from a car window. Kinda unnerving .

-Sean

[SATundra]

Good one EDJ.

[DJ]

Originally posted by DeepStealth
I could not stop laughing when I read that one !

Also, the black bears in Alaska, the ones who are used to eating garbage, eventually enjoy the taste of pepper spray, and will actually open their mouths if you squirt them at close range, say from a car window. Kinda unnerving .

-Sean

Do you know how to identify black bears and grizzly bears by their droppings?

Black bear droppings are full of nuts, seeds, and fruit pits, and they smell like dung.

Grizzly bear droppings are full of socks, wristwatches, and underwear, and they smell like pepper spray.

[Simias]

EDJ....LMMFAO!!